fall...winter

all the leaves fell off today
i swear they were all there yesterday

grey skies
grey atmosphere

traveling

today we are in pa, yesterday we were in sc
what a phenomenon

enjoying time with family and frizends, and tomorrow a shower :)
shopping and EATING my mom's food and planning for a certain day in December

i need some new music to listen to - got any ideas?

i've had enough car drama over the last few weeks to last me a couple of years
but yay for dodge chargers

Yay for completion

My cd is done and I have copies, and I'm selling them for $7. I also hope to play some upcoming shows in Columbia.

If anyone wants to hear my music, I just set up a band myspace. It only has one song right now, but more will come...

www.myspace.com/genevievenelson

The monotony...

mrar....

The unexpected...

I'm freaking engaged!!!

Sleep is NOT over-rated

can't sleep - roll over
roll back - mind sobers
tomorrow drones on and on and on
in my head as the minute hand takes on
the form of a man who is torturing me
like a rattling fan or a faucet that leaks
closing my eyes but my mind can't be closed
thinking about how fast eight hours goes

Posting images as background on Blogger

So, does anyone know how to post an image as a background for Blogger?

...

Never mind. I just figured it out. I was working on it all afternoon yesterday, and I sat down today and figured it out in the first 15min. Sometimes you just need a fresh pair of eyes.

My first cd

For all of you who are wondering (and read my blog) or have heard the rumors, my cd is done. If you would like a copy please let me know. If you have a place for me to play my stuff, let me know too ;)

Moving in the room

You are

You just
are

And you're moving in the room
Beauty is moving
And I am crying in the center
At my table
Spiritual experience is not dead
Though You are rare

Je-sus, Je-sus, Je-sus, Jesus

Iridescent illuminator of the world
King of the vast delta of my emotions

Stay forever

i am four walls

i am four walls
and a flat ceiling
my walls are perpendicular
to my ceiling
and my fixed floor
vertical lines running in perfect symmetry

i am solid
come in...with permission
interrupt...at my leisure

i am decorated
symmetrical 2-D boxes
propped by straight nails
tilt if you dare

i am four walls
i am in control


This is taking my natural personality to an extreme. If I had not and do not continue to allow God to change me as a person, this could be what my life looks like. I like straight lines; I like order; and sometimes I like them at the expense of other things - other more important things - like people.

This also, somewhat accurately, describes the office I work in every day...

the phenomenon of trendy clothing stores

yesterday i walked into new york and a company of strangers greeted me with appraising stares. the gap between myself and them was subtly expressed by their glance from my mid-section to the clothing rack. the abercrombies and the fitches of the place had never encountered this gauntlet of glances. khakis zeros and ones graced the hips of those americans with eagle eyes fixed on me. jeans fashioned old and navy-colored taunted me from thin shelves. i didn't belong here; apparently i would have to go elsewhere to find the place where trend and reality coincide.

For those of you who are wondering, I am not bitter about these trendy stores, or the fact that their sizes do not fit most normal women. I am simply stating one of the ironies of life: we tend to live in extremes (trend and unreality vs. out-of-date and reality). This affects more areas of our lives than clothes-shopping. Trendiness is not just for the ones who can fit into the size 2 jeans. Up-to-dateness is not just for the young. I'm not saying that everyone needs to be "trendy" per se, but I might be saying that everyone needs to be up-to-date. I haven't decided yet. Trends can tell you something about culture. We need to pay attention to trends. Sometimes trends are more than wanting to change a few standards. Sometimes trends are a complete change in worldview.

Blow up the credit card companies

Re-set the debt to zero
Re-make the man - a hero
All you girls in twill pants and ties
Stand in your rows and sing "open the eyes..."

Fight for your backgrounds
The sports car? The mountains?
Waving white flags for
Your anger, your justice

The plastic Gucci [man].

Hi-ho; hi-ho

You know how there's just some people you don't necessarily want to see first thing when you get into work? Yeah, well I wasn't so lucky today. And then you know how you can make the decision to either let their comments roll off your back or let them ring in your ears and cry? Yeah, well I feel like doing the latter. Cry, cry, cry. That's what I did last night. I had a migraine and I cried. And it was my last night with Ian, for a while. Suck.

The authority of whom?

There once was a man
With integrity at heart
Who cut loose the bindings
He had let himself be tied into.

Some thought he was crazy
Some thought he was wise
But all that he sought was to be
Condoned in his authority's eyes.

The authority of whom?

A visit to the trees'-knees

Got to go to the Congaree National Forest today, otherwise known as the Congaree swamp. My favorite part of the park is the deck that spawns off of the boardwalk and overlooks the lake. We got to watch the turtles bobbing in the water and sunning on the logs. My second favorite part of the park is the trees' knees. The cypress trees' roots stick up out of the murkiness that surrounds the bottom of the trees (and basically everything in the swamp), and they are called knees, but I prefer to call them gnomes. So, I got to introduce Ian to the gnome-folk today. It was a gorgeous day-perfect for being outside. Just to make sure y'all don't make the same mistake we did, check the map for directions first. We ended up in Orangeburg today because we went too far down I-26, when we were supposed to take I-77 to Bluff Road. We weren't lost. We just stopped at a gas station, looked at a map, and took the scenic route through the corn fields. If you're reading this, and you're not a big fan of South Carolina in general, you should definitely check out Congaree before you leave this state. Swamps are the in thing...

Who wears the spiritual pants?

What does spiritual leadership/headship look like in a marriage? Ian and I were trying to figure this out last night. What is the man's role, and what is the woman's role? Obviously, the woman doesn't just sit by and let the guy be the spiritual one, and do nothing. But I think there is a difference in the roles; it's not exactly equal. Those of you who are married, what have you experienced in your marriages? Those who are unmarried, what are your thoughts on it, and what have you seen in your parents?

Me flittering around

Well, I've had tons of stuff to blog about, but now that I actually get a chance to do it, nothing comes to mind. Figures... It's been too long since I've posted. But I've been writing. New songs, new quasi-poetry. I need to keep writing. I had a great weekend with various friends, and I'm really looking forward to going to Michigan this coming weekend with Ian. I can't wait to see his home and meet everybody there.

I would write more, but I have so much in my heart that it is overflowing beyond the blog...

This place where I live

I really want to get in on the music scene in Columbia. I feel like I’ve been here for so long, but not really been here.

Are you doing anything?

Stretch me out
Till I am thin
Not so I look good
But so I look real
And have to trust

Get me down
Let me wonder at
The sadness
You let me writhe
In inner angst

Give me vision
Make me discontent
So I can better listen
And be ready
For it when it comes

You're doing something

I'm better today

almost dry eyes. i cried this morning, but it was over the Lord's goodness and not issues in life :)

i love music. i want to do music - that's what i want to do with my life.

maybe i should say i want to be a musician. i like the "be" word more than the "do" word.

i am discontent in my jobs, because i really want to be doing music. will i ever be content doing it on the side? i don't think that's reason enough to cop out on my jobs now, just because sometimes they're hard, because i really am learning, and i'm trying to learn being.

maybe someday Passion will pick me up and ask me to sing for them...

Crying over spilled milk

Okay, I'm crying over what the old adage tells me not to cry over. I don't think I've ever cried in front of my boss before, but I did today.

I had a project
It was my own
I gave it my heart
The seeds they were sown
For a beautiful work
Or so I thought
Unknowingly feeding myself
To the flock
Of faceless participants
Each wanting say
In my project they said
Was going astray

Now it's still my project
And mine it will stay
At least in the stated-
Idealized way
My heart still is beating
My mind is still ticked
But sooner or later
This mountain will shift
People will learn
To trust one another
And push for the change
Push with me brother

Differences alike

The conversation went something like this...

Genevieve: "Ian, you're a punk."
Ian: "You're a princess."
Genevieve: "That's going in my blog."

Yo tengo un novio nuevo

For those of you who have not heard, I recently acquired a boyfriend. Yes, Friday night he took me out on the most romantic date I have ever been on, and asked me if I would be his girlfriend. Call it juvenile, but we're both pretty smitten. If you want details, please ask; I love telling the story.

A stumbling block

What do you think it means to be a "stumbling block" to someone? And how far do we go in order not to be a stumbling block for another person? I mean, do we give up everything questionable, just in case someone has a problem with that certain action? You can't know someone has a problem with what you're doing unless they confront you on it. How can I be responsible for what people might possibly be thinking? If someone tells me they have a problem with what I am doing, and it is causing a spiritual roadblock for them, I will gladly stop for that person's sake, but am I to not do the thing just because it might be a spiritual roadblock to someone that hasn't told me it is?

I was pondering these things by the fireplace last night around 1:30am (I guess that would be this morning), and I couldn't come to a conclusion, except I think I disagree with Mr. Bedell. That kind of scares me, because he is a very wise man. Maybe I'm just rebellious.

Update on my life

My heart's not very pretty when it's naked.

I'm glad people still like me.

I'm glad Jesus liked me before I realized how my heart looks, and when he already did.

Got foreign countries on the brain...

I guess no one really wanted to talk about sex, judging from the response to my last blog :)

Oh well, different subject. Tonight I went to see the movie Memoirs of a Geisha. I guess that's partly why I say I got foreign countries on the brain. There's also this song by Fleming & John that I've been listening to that has quite an Indian flair. I know, different foreign countries and different cultures. There's so many places I want to go. And you can't extricate the people from the places, so I want to get involved in the lives of the people that live in those places too.

Maybe it all comes back to connecting. Maybe I just want to connect with the people and the environment and with God halfway around the world. I kind of like the sound of that. Anybody got free plane tickets??